Why NOT Me?

The Question

A few years ago, one of my students asked me if I had ever felt angry about having had cancer, or if I had ever questioned “Why me?” during or after my diagnosis and treatment. My response came easily, “No.” That question had honestly never crossed my mind. If I would have questioned anything, I would have asked, “Why NOT Me?”

I’m not sure why I felt that way. I know my husband wondered why I had to suffer through chemotherapy and several surgeries in one year, not to mention the emotional burden of fear and anxiety a cancer diagnosis brings. These are certainly reasons that would lead someone to ask “Why Me?” And, I wouldn’t blame anyone whose first reaction was just that. But, I think, for me, it came down to the fact that I couldn’t find a reason to get angry and bitter; to ask that question.

First, what would that accomplish? Being bitter would not help my health at all.

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength (Proverbs 17: 22)

Second, why would I wish that on someone else? Because, if not me, then who? Am I so special that I shouldn’t have to get sick, feel sad, or be scared?

Great Joy

If I remain angry or bitter about having to live through trials, I will miss out on the blessings that come from those experiences. James tells us that trials are an opportunity for great joy, so choose joy!

“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy”

(James 1:2)

I, genuinely, would not give up one second of the pain, fear, or sickness I experienced through having cancer. Through that trial, I gained so much more than I ever lost. Yes, I lost time with my young children because I was so sick, I lost my hair, I lost parts of my body, I lost my life as I knew it, because one is different after having had cancer.

But, you see, I met the Lord through that trial and He changed me forever. In fact, it was through that trial that He redeemed me, restored me, both physically and spiritually.  So, I lost some things, but the riches I gained far outweigh the losses and the riches will last forever.

We all suffer trials. Maybe you have a sick child, are in a season of homelessness, in an abusive relationship, suffered the loss of a child, parent, or spouse, are in a bad marriage, have a physical or mental illness, have pain, are unemployed, and the list goes on. Do not take these seasons for granted!

Lives Changed

For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing (James 1:3-4)

We are never the same when we get to the other side of a trial. The people we become once we’ve walked through the valley are the people we present to our friends, our families, our fellow colleagues, the guy we pass in the grocery store, or the woman behind the counter at a restaurant. We touch lives every day, therefore we change lives every day.

I encourage you to choose joy, taking the good from every experience and leave the anger, bitterness, and resentment behind so that when you do touch the lives of others, you touch them with light, with love and kindness, empathy, and genuine care. You will touch them with great joy because you are filled with great joy! Let God work in you. Let Him be evident and glorified through your suffering. Stand bold and say, “Why NOT me, God?” and reap the benefits!